New years resolution

Its been forever since I wrote here. With that said, I think that I will be using this blog in a totally different way. In order to be more accountable, to follow my new years resolution more thoroughly or at least one I them, I shall use this blog as a weight loss tracker. I'm not wanting to lose weight for all the vain reasons a lot of people lose weight for. I want to lose weight for health reasons. Im tired of being in pain. Im tired of not having the energy to run around and chase my sons.... And they aren't even old enough to fully run around yet. But most importantly I want to be healthy enough to live a long life to be around them for as long as I possibly can. This is even more important to me, with the recent discovery of my mom having diabetes. With her being recently diagnosed with it, and knowing that my grandfather had it as well, scares me. I dealt with gestational diabetes, and that scared me enough. I was able to manage it, and didn't have any major complications with it, but it was still something that I don't want to deal with in a long term/ rest of my life type basis. So I want to ensure that I can do all that I can in my power to eliminate this potential disease from my life.


So... Here goes.
While pregnant, because of the gestational diabetes, I had to cut back on my carbs. And just doing that helped me lose weight. With my hip hurting as sporadically and painful as it has been, I don't want to just jump into working out, as much as I want to, with fears of hurting myself even more, and the eliminating any potential results that I could attain. So I'm hoping that I can lose weight through diet alone for the time being, so that can get to the point where I can get more active. Today has been other first day of eating fewer carbs then I am used to, and I'm not going to lie. It's HARD! But I have to remember. It was soo hard in the beginning while pregnant too.. But if I can get to the point where I didn't even crave carbs while pregnant, then I know I can do it now as well. So... My starting weight in all of this is ....oh gosh, am I really about to say this out loud, for anyone to see? Yes. This ends now. As ashamed as I am to say this, and as much as I told myself that I would NEVER get back to my heaviest, sadly I have to admit, if I continue going the way I have been, I'm afraid I would hit that point, and surpass it even. ok..here goes. My starting weight is 290.4lbs. Oh my goodness.. How did I get back to this? Not that I ever ever have been skinny by all means. I was thrilled it have lost the 50lbs at my heaviest, and was looking to losing more. But I would never trade skinny for my Char Monster. I will not weigh in every day. Maybe every week. But I will definitely check in often. I might even post pics... I think that will even make me more accountable.